A customer walked into my store yesterday…

Young, bright-eyed and curious, she took her time walking. Striking up a conversation with her, I found out that she suspected she was pregnant and was waiting for a doctor's appointment for confirmation. She expressed that her boyfriend came from the type of family that would expect him to ”man up” and not abandon his responsibilities, and that she wasn't feeling particularly scared, more so accepting. From my retail experience and observations, she was exploring her options as she walked about. She also mentioned that she was in college and commuting.

I didn't think it was too forward, but I asked her if she was on social media (I know, asking an 18-year-old if she’s on social media) and proceeded to give her my business card and flyer. I let her know that if she had any questions about anything she could email me, so we’ll see what happens! 

After she left, I started thinking about what it must be like for a person of any age to be on the verge of finding out about a pregnancy. Especially for someone in her situation: a full-time college student. This led me to blog about it, because it made me back up to the young or first-time parents who may not have everything figured out. The way our conversation flowed, I hoped I asked her the right questions to put her in the right frame of mind for not underestimating what might be her new path. There are some initial things to consider when first suspecting and finding out that you are pregnant to help you start preparing. 

So, when you suspect that you are pregnant, what are some of the immediate things to consider that will help you get your birth plan together? 

Do you have a village/network of support? For her, she said that she would have access to a supportive network, most likely her and her boyfriend’s family. This is not always an option and if that’s the case, what is your plan? I find this to be so important, because who is going to be surrounding you with words of encouragement while you're pregnant and as you transition in your fourth trimester? Who will you be able to call if you need to fake a nap, take a quick shower, or cook a meal? 

Do you have a provider? You may have an OB/GYN already, and you may also be familiar with the hospitals and birthing centers of your area. If not, now is a good time to start researching. So, however you choose - whether it’s Googling on your phones or computers or asking friends and family for recommendations, start looking into Providers and birthing facilities. 

Do not take the decision of selecting a care provider lightly. You want someone who is going to mirror your birthing beliefs and try to enforce them as much as possible. Having a mismatched provider can lead to unnecessary birth trauma and a less than satisfactory birth experience. Also, just because you already have an OB/GYN doesn't mean he/she is the right doctor for your delivery. For tips on choosing a provider, read my other post: https://bit.ly/2Zdh9Nl

Have you thought about where you're giving birth? This goes hand-in-hand with the last question. Your provider may have a preferred birthing location, which will limit your options. If you are able to have a midwife for your birth, you can consider giving birth at home. If having a home birth is of interest to you, you'll want to educate yourself on how to prepare, the risks, and how to have the safest home birth. If you're unsure, you can at least plan to labor at home for as long as possible. 

For help with deciding, click here: https://bit.ly/2TGNTJK

Are you taking a prenatal vitamin? If you are confirmed to be pregnant or trying to get pregnant, make sure you are taking a prenatal! You can buy over-the-counter, or you can also visit your primary care or OB/GYN and get a prescription (usually covered by insurance). 

How do you imagine a baby will change your lifestyle/ how will you need to adapt? Being that my customer was a full-time student, there is already a semi-set routine - her classes. We talked about if she wanted to breastfeed and what would mean for pumping and storing milk if she planned on continuing in her studies. 

Now, I will say that once a person makes the leap into parenthood, a shift is mindset is required to accommodate the new set of responsibilities. Being that this woman’s wish was to not abandon her academic pursuits, she would need to take some time after labor and then readjust to her new normal.

What are your plans for prenatal care? Outside of choosing a provider, you will be carrying this tiny person for approximately nine months. This means that you solely are tasked with making sure that the baby receives all of its physical and emotional nourishment prior to entering the world outside of the womb. 

Do you feel that there are any changes you need or want to make that will get you in a better state for parenting? Even before birth, while you are carrying the baby, are you eating well? In good physical shape? How do you feel about becoming a parent? If there is anything that makes you pause or hesitate, take time to sit down with a qualified professional.

How do you envision your birth going? Have you ever given any thought to how a labor should go? What images pop into your head? Places? Scents? People? Location? Regardless of where you decide to give birth, you have options in methods for both medical and nonmedical pain relief. 

Along with thinking about how a labor should go, think have you thought about how you would like your labor to go? You have a lot more say in it than you think!! 

What are you reading/watching? I suggested that she might want to start looking at birth videos to help her prepare. I did mention that not all she found would be serene, but there were ones that exist with gentle births, so she would know that it is possible. 

I hope for anybody reading this that this gave you some things to think about if you haven't already started. This is not meant to be an extensive guide, but rather an introduction to planning.  I'm excited to see if my potential mommy stops back in with an update! 

I'm excited to see if my potential mommy stops back in with an update!